top of page

How Long Should You Date Before Getting Engaged in Your 30s

Many people who find someone in their 30s wonder how long they should date before getting engaged. They’re later in life and don’t want to take as much time before getting married.

So, how long should you date before getting engaged in your 30s? This is not a decision that can be made based on a general rule. The decision entirely revolves around the couple, their goals in life, and their relationship. Couples in their 30s who still want to have children might take less time to date before getting engaged and married. People who are content in their relationship and career might not be in a hurry.

Here are some things to consider when deciding how long to date before getting engaged in your 30s.

If you’re in your 30s with friends and family already married with kids, you’re probably anxious to move on with your life in marriage as well. Family get-togethers become filled with awkward questions about when you’re going to get married.

Now that you’ve finally found someone that you want to spend the rest of your life with, you might be wondering how long you should date before getting engaged.

Dating Timeline in Your 30s

When you’re in your 20s, there’s not as much of an urgency to get engaged and married. They have so much time to plan their future and think about having kids and making a life with their special someone.

However, in your 30s, you’re likely starting to think about running out of time to start a family. You’ve possibly already been in an unsuccessful relationship and you’re ready to finally settle down.

People who find someone special in their 20s typically date for about 2 years before getting engaged with marriage following about a year later. Couples are typically more comfortable marrying someone they’ve spent a lot of time with and known for a long time. Everyone is different and every relationship goes at its own pace.

The reason you might not consider waiting as long when you’re in your 30s varies depending on the person. Many people are well aware of what they want (and don’t want) in a person by the time they’re in their 30s. It doesn’t take them long to figure out if the person they are dating is the one they want to spend the rest of their life with.

How Long Should You Date Before Getting Married?

Should being in your 30s make a difference on how long you date someone before engagement and marriage? Should a ticking clock determine how long you date?

The key to any relationship is how much you love each other and if both people are ready to get married at that point in time.

Will you walk away from someone simply because they’re not ready to get married after just 6 months? If you would, perhaps you don’t love him as much as you think you do?

You should spend time getting to know one another, their likes and dislikes, morals and religious beliefs, hobbies, friends and family, and more. However long it takes to get to know your special someone cannot be determined by a number.

Ultimately, it doesn’t matter if you’ve been dating for 6-months or 3 years. The important thing is why you’re still dating if why you’re interested in getting engaged and married to the other person.

Are you dating someone because you’re over 30, desperate, and can’t find anyone else to marry? If this is the only reason you’re dating someone, maybe you need to re-evaluate why you’re seeing the person you’re with. You should make sure that you’re in the relationship for the right reason. If it takes you a while longer to make sure this is the person you really want to be with, then so be it. It’s not a race.

How long you date in your 30s shouldn’t have a fix timely or expectation. If you or your boyfriend aren’t ready for the next step just yet, then it’s perfectly normal and expected that you should continue dating for longer.

Here are some personal stories and examples of people who married in their 30s.

I was almost 36 when I met Fiance. Started dating in October 2010. had the “i’m looking for something long term/marriage/kids talk early on. Started looking at rings December 2011. By August 2012 we were engaged. We’re getting married August 12, 2013, so just shy of 3 years together. Glasgowbound, WeddingBee
We met in April of last year, looked at rings in early October, moved in together at the end of October and he proposed in December. As cliche as it sounds, we just knew. We didn’t really feel the need to wait, so we got married last month, after about 13 months of dating. KamAZ, WeddingBee

In conclusion, if in doubt about whether you’re ready to get married or if you should wait longer, just wait. Marriage isn’t something that you enter lightly, and if you’re not ready or aren’t sure, just give it more time.

There is no reason to rush into something so important.

4 views0 comments

Hi, I’m Kristin. While I haven’t found my Prince Charming yet, I’ve been dreaming of getting married for a long long time. I started this site as a place to record all the things I’ve found and researched in preparation for my own wedding someday. I can’t wait to share it all with you!

bottom of page